On most days this, dear readers, is my breakfast.
Yep, this unlovely specimen is how I break my fast more often than not. On most days, I eat al desko due to the fact I start work at an hour so early I dare not name it for fear of invoking its fury. In winter, I arrive and leave my office in darkness. This bowl of porridge is my only solace.
Mine and porridge's relationship has lasted for years, and so I feel I can share the secret of our continued acquaintance:
33g of porridge oats
Two dried figs, cut into small dice
Pumpkin, flax, sesame and sunflower seeds
Enough non-dairy milk to cover
How you do it
Approach office microwave with trepidation. Wonder why it smells faintly like fish, or pasta sauce, depending on the day.
Sniff the office soy milk to check its age. Slightly funky? Take the risk anyway.
Put oats, figs and seeds in bowl, add enough non-dairy milk to cover. Depending on your accurate judging of milk, enjoy porridge that resembles a wadi or a paddy field.
Microwave for three minutes.
Remove bowl from microwave. Try not to burn hands.
Put burnt hands under cold water.
Add sliced banana.
Eat while processing tonne of pointless email. Contemplate own mortality.
So, there you go. That's what I do most days. Sometimes, I make overnight oats for a change - rolled oats, chopped up and left to soak up soy milk over night, with some cocoa powder and frozen cherries. Next morning, they get to keep company with a chopped banana and chocolate chips.
Happily, I also have weekends too. Weekends are much better. At weekends, you can enjoy proper breakfasts. Avo toast. Tofu scrambles. Stuff on muffins.
A couple of Mofo's ago, I wrote about cooking a vegan full English, so, in honour of Vegan Mofo's breakfast theme today, I've decided to move things on a bit and make a full English breakfast burrito.
Alright, alright, there's no mushrooms, facon, or beans, so technically this is a half English breakfast, but still, there's only so much you can fit in a burrito.
Ingredients: hash browns, sausages, tomatoes, scrambled tofu. Not pictured: the tonnes of brown sauce I added. Yes, brown sauce. IT IS BETTER THAN RED SAUCE FOR BREAKFAST and if you disagree I will come through the screen and shake you.